"Back to life...back to reality..."

It's all coming to a screeching halt. Soon I will no longer be a 100% stay-at-home-mom. Aw, it ain't as bad as it seems. Things will be pretty much the same, only with me working one day a week. It just amazes me that it is approaching so soon. When people use to ask me "when are you going back to work?" I'd proudly answer "oh, not till he's six months old" each time smiling inside, thinking I had all the time in the world. Well Christopher is five months and one week old. Holy moly, how did I get here so quick? Over the past week I have been prepping for my return into the work force. I have had to leave Christopher behind, in the care of my mom, as I took care of business. It has only been for a max of four hours, which is nice, as it weans me into the "separation". So next week when I am gone for three long eight-hour days (orientation), it won't come as a utter shock. Maybe I won't cry. All this seems to not phase Christopher in the least bit. He is a happy-go-lucky kid.

I decided to apply at Franklin Square Hospital, so I could work much closer to home. I still plan to pick up a few shifts at Johns Hopkins, because I have a soft spot in my heart for neuro patients. This past Wednesday I attended a CPR re-certification class. Wow, if that wasn't a real "eye-opener" into how mushy my brain has gotten. I was so spaced out during the class, very clumsy and distracted. Not myself at all. Then the topic turned to infant CPR. I almost lost it, feeling compelled to run out of the room and phone home to check on Christopher. Man, when did I become such a softy? I thought it was just post-pregnancy hormones that made me tear up at a mere diaper commercial. But I am learning now that motherhood carves new places in your heart and never again are you the same. Anyway, I hope that at least my mental sharpness returns as I return to work. I am kinda worried about myself. Maybe its a good thing I'll soon be a 99% stay-at-home-mom.